Weird Pregnancy Food Combo Thingy

What do these things have in common?

Denali® Extreme Maximum Fudge Moose Tracks by Private Selection

and

McAlister's Deli Potato Salad?

Nothing with the exception that they are both hanging out in my tummy. This would be my very first documented weird pregnancy food combo thingy. I didn't plan such a combination. Nope. At first I just wanted something really cold and sweet. So I made myself a huge, okay-regular sized, bowl of ice cream. When I had polished that away, I opened the refrigerator and my eyes beheld last nights left over potato salad. Mouth watering, I grabbed a spoon and dove in.

Alex was repulsed. Revolted. Jaw open, blank stare, stunned. I made yummy smacking noises of pure enjoyment. I haven't been this satisfied since last weeks rare New York Strip steak. 

Okay, so maybe its not the first weird craving I've had.

60 Days To Go, Give or Take

Today I am 60 days away from my original due date. I have roughly 60 days until I find out if we'll be bringing home a little boy or girl.

We've had the names picked out since maybe the moment we found out. I'm not sure if I want to officially reveal what they are yet. All I will say at this point is that they are a) not unusual, b) can be found in our family history one way or another, c) and are in no way named after their grandparents.

So far I've only gained 12 pounds. I've done a little bit of math and determined that if 2 of the 12 pounds is boob that leaves me with 10 pounds. Minus 3 pounds for the baby. Minus 3 pounds of fluid and 4 pounds of uterus, that means at this point I may just walk out of the hospital weighing the same or less than before I got pregnant. I know, but a girl can day-dream right.

Weeks ago I finished the baby's room. The paint job took me longer than any project I have ever undertaken in my life. 18 hours of taping and painting to be exact. I'm hoping the story goes something like this: it took me longer to paint your room than it did for me to have you. Fingers crossed. Here are some pictures of the almost final product.

My Mother-in-Law, Boba, bought us this lovely crib and dresser set complete with the mattress. My mother crocheted us the blanket and sent the stuffed animals. I have also received another beautiful baby blanket from my step-mother, Linda, but that's not in this particular picture.

My mom sent us this rocking chair as a present. The wood looks a little dark but in person it matches very well. My sister, Em, made the little fleece pillow and blanket.

I really like these curtains. It has these giant fireworks-like pattern embroidered down the panels.

I included this picture to show off my talent for painting stripes. The secret is in the taping. You have to become best friends with a laser level to get results like this. Also, being able to do math is an added bonus. 

I say "almost finished project" because there are two or three things I still want to add to the room, paint wise. I'm hoping my friend Selene will be able to come over this weekend and draw and paint in a large tree in the corner. From the tree branches I plan on hanging some picture frames that will have the baby's initials. And maybe a cute blue and pink bird or two. And then the painting will be done. At this point, I'm good with it looking like this until college graduation. 

60 days doesnt' seem like to far away. On the other hand, it feels like forever. Right now I'm okay with each day taking it's time. It means I don't have to deal with the other scary thing that comes after- being a parent. There's no count down to when that ends. It will be nice to finally see the little creature that has been doing full body flips for the last couple of months. That and giving it a name. :)

Unemployed Breakfast

I’ve been out of work for 7 days now. Super bored out of my mind. I’ve seen Alex for probably a total of 45 minutes combined. Our conversations have been made up of guttural sounds and whale calls. So basically, nothing significant. The house can’t get any cleaner than it already is. Well, maybe a little cleaner but I have to give myself something to do next week. I woke up today at 7 am. I’m not sure what I did for an hour but around 8 I decided to make breakfast. Pancakes from scratch, cheap-o bacon, and Simply® Orange Juice. I added apple butter to the pancakes this time but I’m not happy with how they turned out. The flavor wasn’t appley enough. 

Anyway, I ate breakfast alone, did all the dishes, and then woke up Alex. As soon as I said breakfast he was wide awake. I sat next to him while he ate telling him about the hilarious parenting horror stories I’ve been reading on one of my favorite sites (crappypictures.com) and when he was done he laid down on the couch. Leaving his plates behind. No problem dear, I know you’re the breadwinner so please let me pick up after you. Eating breakfast is so exhausting, or maybe it was the fact that he stayed up until 4 am watching something on YouTube. Anyway, I tried to get some adult conversation out of him... “Tell me about Whats-His-Face at workl? When do you think you’ll be home tonight? That’s great you have 2 days off! What do you want to do?” I got about 10 minutes of conversation out of him before he dozed off to sleep. Awesome. 

I hate being unemployed. How am I ever going to be a stay-at-home mom?

20 Weeks Down, 20 Weeks To Go

Half way done. It feels like it took forever to get this far and I have to wait another 20 weeks to see the final product. 

I am happy, on the other hand, to finally start showing. Well, at least in this picture I do. When I wear my hoodie or some of my other clothes I just look like a typical big girl.

The baby moves a lot. We call it "the Kid" which drives my mother crazy. She says I'm not pregnant with a goat. Aunt Emily calls it "the feti" which I happen to think is adorable. Her theory: if you have many mushrooms they're called fungus but if you have one mushroom its called a fungi. So if you're pregnant with multiples they should be referred to as fetus but one baby should be called a feti. That drives grandma crazy too. Sometimes you just have to laugh. Back to the Kid moving. I haven't experienced a lot of kicking. Nope, I get full body flips. The baby will bunch itself up into one little corner, usually right under my stomach and right lung and then stretch out diagonally. The movement feels like something you see in Olympic swimming when the swimmer gets to the end of the pool and does that twisty-flippy push-off thing to do another lap. I'm not sure what the move is called but that what this kid does. That, and it likes to River dance on my bladder. That's always fun.

Overall, I really have no complaints. This has been one of the easiest pregnancies I have ever heard of. It's uneventful is a great way. I never had morning sickness. I haven't had a cold or the flu yet. There are some days I feel more tired than the other, but that's to be expected. I've had no strange food cravings or food pairing. No bad reactions to foods or smells and I sleep comfortably through the night. As a matter of fact, I had the most sacrilegious thought of my entire life just the other day- this pregnancy has been so easy so far that I don't Mary had it this good with baby Jesus. I know, cringe worthy, but I hope it made you laugh.

Here's what will probably be our last picture of the Kid until we see him face to face.

A Good Chicken

I decided at the beginning of this year that 2012 would be dedicated to the medical profession. It all started on December 23rd when Alex and I took a trip to the ER because Alex had a significant amount of blood in his urine. $183 and an hour or so later we were on our way home. Alex had a new catheter to care for and our Christmas Day party was effectively cancelled. A few hours after that we were back in the ER when the catheter stopped working. 15 minutes later and another $183 and we were heading home again. I have pictures of Alex's humiliation but for the sake our retaining a healthy marriage I won't be posting them. Sorry.

Oh... did I mention that we don't have a single ounce of health insurance.

The good news I quickly discovered was the joys of "uninsured discounts". Because we were uninsured, the hospital decreased our bill from a little over $6000 down to $2400 and allowed us to make payment arrangements that were reasonable. So did the Urologists that he had to see in the following days.

Shortly after our cruise in the Bahamas in May, I began to limp. As the months (yep plural) progressed my hobbling grew worse. I finally called an end to the ludicrous behavior on the day that it took me until 1 pm to be able to put any pressure at all on my left foot. The next day I was at the Podiatrist's office for a 5 minute examine that determined I had a bone spur in my heel. I was given a cortisone shot which "burned like hell" just like the doctor said it would and was sent on my merry way less in pain and $100 poorer.

I think that's when it dawned on me that not having insurance isn't all that bad. I've even made appointments for the two of us to have our teeth cleaned next month.

My theory of course was shot to hell just a few days ago. September 25 to be exact. That's the day I had my regular, yearly gynecologist visit (which by the way only costs $84 if you pay the same day in cash). For some bizarre reason the night before I decided I'd take a pregnancy test just for giggles.

This is where I go off on a tangent for just a moment. You see I've taken dozens of pregnancy tests over the last 12 years and not a single one has ever, ever, ever been positive. Not even close. This is because I was diagnosed with PCOS (Poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome) back in 2003. For those who are not aware of what this is, it means that I make the eggs, I just never hatch them from my ovaries. I tell all in my typically disturbing fashion of uncomfortable humor that I'm not a good chicken. After we were married, Alex and I tried 3 rounds of fertility treatment with no success. As a matter of fact the ONLY time I ovulated (and I've probably taken more ovulation tests than pregnancy tests) was when Alex was in Detroit for 11 days opening the new MGM Grand. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor. About 4 years ago, we gave up believing that we would ever ever ever have a family. Even adoption seemed to be a stretch financially, mainly because you have to have health insurance.

So back to my story and you probably know where I'm going with this now. At 6 am, I woke up, took the dog out to pee, and decided to take one of the pregnancy tests. Only this time it was so very positive I had to read the box to figure out if my eyes were deceiving me. I walked into the bedroom, rudely turned on the light, and handed Alex the test. Not understanding what he was reading, I told him it was positive and began to cry. My tears were of fear. Raw fear.... because.... what IF it was lying? I was so overwhelmed with the possibility that I might hope again only to be let down. There are only a few handful of people out there that might be reading this that can truly understand the depths of my despair. So I took another one and got the same results. And then we laughed!

Off to the doctor's office we went. A bunch of questions, another pregnancy test, and an ultrasound later and we're officially 8 weeks pregnant! My doctor was kind enough to only bill us for the original appointment since it will cost $500 up front for the ultrasound alone! Then there's the blood work and the other appointments and other stuff that I can only speculate upon. So the moral of the story is we're getting insurance. And when we go back in 3 weeks, we'll have another ultrasound that will be "official" as every thing should be when it costs $500.

In the mean time, we're pretty darn excited that I've finally been able to hatch an egg.